Sunday, September 28, 2014

Five Villains That Will Leave You Feeling... Ahem... "Thor"

I'm still stewing a little bit over a health insurance premium issue I had, today, but I won't waste overlong precious space discussing it for the blog.  I'll just hope a VERY measured phone conversation will help resolve that issue, come tomorrow.  ... If various elements at work don't "harsh my mellow".  So, off to the blog entry, proper!

And today's entry comes from a VERY unusual inspiration!  People that know me, and have discussed the topic with me, know that I was REALLY not much of a fan of the first season of "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D".  I tried the first three episodes of the story, and just felt that it didn't have much to offer that was different from standard network Adventure offerings.  Even the Marvel Universe elements felt VERY far removed.  I've heard-tell that the first season REALLY did improve, over time, and the Marvel Universe spices were thrown around more liberally.  But to get through that, I'd have to deal with those... and these are my opinions... boring "attractive" hacker, REALLY annoying "quirky" scientists, and generic "tough" strong types.  My patience only goes so far for media that I have well-established in my mind as being "not entertaining". 

Imagine my shock when not only do I happen to stick around for the second season premiere of "Agents", but I actually kind of LIKED it!  Not enough to want to follow the rest of the season, but also there was enough good-will to not want to sigh and mess around with another entertainment source on the side.  So what kept me from bypassing this particular episode?  Why, a certain prominent appearance by one of my favorite "Thor" villains in the episode!  Of course, from what I was able to gather, the connective thread between this character and the one I KNOW exists in the comics with Thor's half-brother, Loki, was not mentioned in the episode.  But hey, it's still early in the show, so I assuming they're keeping that character element a mystery.  (I'm also guessing they're keeping the actor playing this particular character's voice a mystery, too.  In the comics...  and later for this entry... the character is a bit of a LOUD-MOUTH.  So having him be "silent and violent" for "Agents" was a bit of a buzzkill.)  And that appearance made me realize I've not discussed much about the Son of Odin, and some of my personal favorite threats the God of Thunder has faced in his career.  Floodgates: consider yourself open, and all because of a random television show screening!
The Destroyer- Granted, this living weapon had its moment in the media sun with the first "Thor" feature film, but I cannot help but enjoy this living engine of destruction!  The Destroyer armor first appeared in "Journey Into Mystery #118", where it was in intended to be a weapon created by Odin to thwart a menace from the stars.  How the Destroyer armor works is if a deity... or even a living being... can transmit its spirit into the Destroyer armor, they can possess the power of the armor.  Once in possession of the armor, the Destroyer has the power to best even a GOD!  Its metal plating can withstand even the impact of the Uru metal that forms Thor's mallet piece of the hammer.  This makes the Destroyer armor custom-made for fisticuffs with a mighty opponent!  This is also enhanced by the Destroyer cannot be exhausted in a conflict, so it takes a licking and keeps on ticking.  But not everything is COMPLETELY hands-on for the Destroyer: from its helmet visor, it is capable of projecting various beams of various strengths.  (The standard rules for comics is whatever the story requires the Destroyer to project... THERE. YOU. GO.)  What makes the Destroyer so entertaining for me for its appearances is that, like pretty much ALL of my Thor villain nominations, it's a creation that can provide a deity-being a physical challenge, and these often lead to entertaining brawling-festivals for Thor to endure for a few multi-issue storylines!  Also, the Destroyer has a "Terminator" element to it, being an unstoppable "machine" of destruction.
Enchantress and Executioner- Okay, okay... Lemme look at the Asgardian birth certificates.  I apologize, I mean to mention their birth-names, Amora and Skurge.  This was almost one of comicdom's first "spite couples", and first began menacing Thor in "Journey Into Mystery #103".  Amora LOVED leading Skurge on, and Skurge lived to make Amora love HIM!  Sadly, this mistress of the Norse mystic arts... trained by Karnilla... only had eyes for the Thunder "Goldilocks".  But until his dying moment... and indeed, as far as I can tell, Skurge has REMAINED deceased since his fall in action against the Dark Elves in an 80's "Thor" storyline... Skurge just would NOT stop trying to prove himself to Amora!  So what makes this odd-coupling so unique to my tastes?  There's the appeal of the seductive evil of the Enchantress... not just to Thor, but to ANY aspect of the Marvel Universe she decides is an obstacle to her ambitions.  (She was even integral to the creation of one of my favorite Marvel heroines, the Valkyrie!)  But the Enchantress is not just solely sex-appeal: she carries with her the mastership of Norse magical powers!  And being part Asgardian and part Frost Giant, the Executioner can give a character of Thor's power levels a serious physical challenge.  It also doesn't hurt that his oft-carried double-headed axe contains magical abilities, such as creating dimensional rifts, and being able to project fire and ice-based attacks!  As for them as a deadly duo, yet ONE MORE positive mark in the Enchantress and Executioner "frenemy" relationship is they were recruits in the second Masters of Evil that Baron Zemo formed!
Ulik- Surely the Trolls of Asgard weren't going to just sit around being cannon-fodder for Odin's crew to fling about in a conflict!  No, they needed their OWN powerhouse dynamo!  Well, in "Thor #137", Ulik the Rock Troll decided to predate the catch-phrase of the People's Champ, The Rock... HEY!!!... and surface from his subterranean realm to layeth the smackdown on Odin's bouncing blonde baby boy!  Since Trolls don't need much of an excuse to get a "mad-on" for ANY Asgardian, having one as powerful as Ulik, who can trade blows with Thor without being overmatched, evened the odds for the much put-upon "wicked" race of Asgard.  But as if this wild-maned and mutton-chopped Troll bruiser wasn't awesome enough for his sheer physical prowess, he ALSO has infra-red vision abilities, due to his underground heritage.  And you have GOT to give it up for a certified "super villain" that basically uses a twin-set of mystic BRASS KNUCKLES as his primary weapons!  SERIOUSLY!  If Ulik was any more predating the defense fads of the 1980's, he would also carry a butterfly knife and a throwing star!  The Trolls may have no friends on Asgard, but whenever Ulik shows up with his Rock Troll posse, he has a friend in me!
The Wrecker- Dirk Garthwaite... and with a name like that, you HAVE to become evil, or an accountant... started off life as an irritable construction worker that was fired for his bad temper.  Does he do the semi-sensible thing, and perform a job search for a locale that WANTS a permanently peeved violent individual for employment?  (Like maybe Wendy's?)  NO!  He decides to create his own costume... STOP SNICKERING AT IT!!!... and become a thief.  His first hot spot?  A random hotel room that a depowered Loki was using to communicate with Karnilla to regain his mystic abilities.  Dirk decides to knock Loki on the noggin, and receives Asgardian magic channeled into his crowbar in "Thor #148"  So... Anything Thor's hammer can do, Wrecker's crowbar can do!  Throw the crowbar?  Comes right back to the Wrecker!  Needs added power?  Well... Thor is already naturally powerful, but the Wrecker receives his immeasurable physical power from his crowbar!  (It also makes him bulletproof, as well!)  So, with the Wrecker, you have ANOTHER character that presents a physical threat to Thor, but he also serves as a mortal mirror to Thor's genesis!  What also makes the Wrecker unique is that he's the ONLY villain on my list that formed his own team of threats!  The Wrecking Crew consists of the leadership of the Wrecker, the ball-and-chain menace of Thunderball, the Juggernaut-esque skill sets of Bulldozer, and...eh... the generic powerhouse-ness of Piledriver.  (Sorry, but Piledriver was ALWAYS the one member of the Wrecking Crew that puzzled me about his specific power set!  It's like he's just there to make the team an even four members for a bowling league tournament, or something.)  Another major difference that the Wrecker possesses above the other villains of Thor for this list is he's EASILY the most versatile for crossover potential.  Name a Marvel hero, and you can practically GUARANTEE the Wrecker has fought him or her at a given time!  Maybe this makes Dirk the "Kevin Bacon" of Marvel villainy!  (And yes, the Wrecker also possesses a Masters of Evil pedigree.  What makes his TRULY special was his involvement in the EPIC "Under Siege" storyline in "Avengers", where Earth's Mightiest Heroes faced their most dire near-defeat in the 1980's!)
Absorbing Man- Remember that character I mentioned appearing in "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D" that made me actually WATCH an episode of that series?  A character I was hoping with ALL hope would figure into the "Thor" cinematic sequel?  Lemme talk about this guy named Carl "Crusher" Creel, who first appeared in "Journey Into Mystery #114".  A former boxer, turned criminal... I, for the life of me CANNOT remember how he ended up in jail... was hand-picked by Loki, for SOME reason, to be the physical arm of his hatred towards Thor.  So Loki slipped a mystic "mickey" into a cup of water Creel drinks in jail, and this additive grants Creel with the ability to absorb ANYTHING he touches.  Finding out this ability can do WONDERS for a jail break, he manages to escape.  But while Creel often talks a big game, as a bruiser would, he would often need direction from Loki for the REAL reason why he was granted his absorbing powers: beat Thor up REAAAL GOOD!  Later, it just becomes a matter of personal rivalry for Creel to show up those hoity-toity Asgardians in general.  What makes Creel unique is that he really CAN absorb anything he sees fit to absorb!  I remember one of his earlier appearances involved him touching Thor's hammer, and being able to absorb the abilities of Mjolnir!  Another conflict, with the Hulk, involved Creel touching the Gamma Giant... NOT INAPPROPRIATELY... and absorbing that irradiated impact!  So Creel is multi-faceted to how he can strategize a battle with any given Marvel hero!  Probably to Executioner's envy, Absorbing Man was EVEN able to hold down a relationship!  But then again, when you couple up with a super-powered villainess named Titania, and you're ALREADY a super-powered criminal, it's not so strange a union.  And the Absorbing Man has left enough of an impression on the Marvel Universe that he's NOW a part of a television series!  Not bad for a big lug who was formerly cooling his heels in a cell-block!



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