TECHNICALLY I could have resumed a somewhat daily schedule, this past week, of posting. I'm actually amazed that the most rough day I had at work was just Monday, solely. (That's not just because of a solid work injury, or two separate rejections for other employment opportunities, or the loss of my parents' sweet cat, Smoky. RIP, lil' buddy...) But I think, mentally, while I still hold this job, I want to make sure that I keep to a weekend schedule, JUST IN CASE I have another stretch of days that just totally wipe me out. But hopefully before year's end, I can reach my 100th. post. And for that post, all of you faithful readers will have the chance to enter a contest that will net you a winning package of goodies so GREAT, Richie Rich will look on with envy. (Or maybe he just does that because I will never, ever, EVER write an entry about him. Sorry, folks, but those Harvey Comics characters never did anything for my reading tastes...)
So this Saturday's entry brings you a profile on a character's various relationships. I remember on my first episode of the short-lived "Gentleman's Guide to Comics" group podcast, I listed this particular character as my number one favorite. Certain factors... shifting interests in other "Top 5" characters, shifting qualities in the stories I've dug further into featuring the character, and the realize that I can't always deal with a character that's EQUAL to my own professional successes... have changed that regard, but there's no denying the linking character I talk about will still hold a fond regard in my thoughts. We all generally associate him as the archetypical "underdog" hero. The one put upon by great power, great responsibility, and drastic twists of fate. But one thing we keep forgetting is his amazingly GRAND luck with attracting ladies! Yeah... Having attractive women constantly walk into one's life is a pretty "lousy hand", eh, Mister Parker? So today, I'll be talking about the various experiences I've had reading about the women in Spider-Man's life!
1. Betty Brant
I'm trying to remember if she was technically the second or third "Spidey-Gal" I encountered from my readings, but she was one of the first steady women in Peter Parker's life. When Peter became a regular fixture at the Daily Bugle, he began laying the foundations for interest in the fetching "cougar-kitten" secretary of J. Jonah Jameson. I say "cougar-kitten", because TECHICALLY Betty was an older woman than Peter Parker, but I'm guessing it was more along the lines of being 4-6 years older. (So her partially dating Peter while he was still in high school isn't so blatantly creepy in that regard.) What was she like as a partner for Peter? Well... She tended to be rather ditzy... but let's be honest: Stan Lee was NEVER great at writing level-headed females. After her brother perished in a battle between Spider-Man and the Scorpion, she often voiced her hatred towards the Friendly Neighborhood Wall-crawler, so that secret identity wasn't a great thing to reveal. It also didn't help that Aunt May Parker... AKA the SOURCE OF ALL SPIDER-MAN EVILS... constantly hassled Betty. I'm betting this pressure led to her suddenly "finding" Ned Leeds to enter her life. Weird that they went off to Europe to elope, then took nearly TEN REAL LIFE YEARS to actually marry. But hey, love works in mysterious ways. But it's not like Betty exited Peter's life completely. When Ned died as part of the whole "Hobgoblin" situation, she began extending her magic typing fingers towards Peter. When Peter's clone, Ben Reilly, became part of a VASTLY OVERLONG saga, she figured if she couldn't ensnare the genuine article, why not go for the Xerox version of her romantic endeavors? I DO know she survived into the "Brand New Day" era of Spider-Man, but I don't think she's nearly as integral in Peter Parker's life. But if memory serves me correctly, she DID start up a fling with Flash "New Venom/Coke" Thompson. Symbiotic webs snare the ladies just as effectively, methinks...
2. Gwen Stacy
You just knew it was going to be a "snap" to mention Gwen Stacy as a part of Peter Parker's life. (Bad taste?) Again, she was still NOT the first "Spider-Lady" I encountered. Plus... and to be fully honest... the main piece of Spider-Man history that she occupied for MANY years of my life was the event of her death. Even after having read her earlier appearances before she perished during the climatic battle between Spider-Man and the Norman Osborne "Green Goblin"... this may sadly still remain the most memorable moment of her character in my regards. I believe it's when Peter Parker enters college that he first crosses paths with the head-banded one... and under the pen/co-plotting of Steve Ditko, she began her life MUCH more harsh than most fans would remember. (But I guess if you're a classmate/friend with Harry Osborne, who was MUCH more of a obnoxious jerk for his first introduction, you'd be a bit of an "Ice Queen" in temperament.) But there was something about the character of Peter Parker that attracted Gwen Stacy. Alas, the curse of being Spider-Man causes complications in Peter's relationships, because after her father... Captain George Stacy... died while saving a child in the middle of a Spider-Man/Doctor Octopus battle, she garnered the Spidey-Loathing sense. But until another character we shall discuss took up the romantic spotlight of Peter's intentions, Gwen Stacy was potentially the most committed relationship Peter Parker had established before her death. The implications even went so far as to suggest he was going to pop the engagement question to her! Gwen's post-death legacy is rather... complicated. She served as a clone, a "floating head of guilt", and most disgustingly, an apparent fling for Norman Osborne to help sire two children that took up the "Goblin" legacy. Ugh... I feel a bit of bile rising in my mouth over that. But apparently Gwen Stacy will be returning... AGAIN... only this time as a legit "Spider-Woman" for an upcoming Spider-Man crossover. I'm still finding myself annoyed that writers can NEVER seem to let Gwen Stacy rest in everlasting peace for TOO long, but oh well... At least she looks REALLY cool in her new Spider-Person costume!
3. Felicia Hardy
I became aware of Felicia Hardy/Black Cat in a weirdly roundabout way. I DID know vaguely of the Black Cat's existence in the Marvel Universe, because the time period I started reading the book, she was engaged in a relationship with Flash Thompson as a spite-dating situation to make Peter Parker jealous. (Man... For a guy that started off as a Parker bully, you can't help but feel BAD for the fact that Flash is sort of "sloppy seconds" for all of Peter's ex-girlfriends!) But I started learning more about her character in a slightly altered form through the 1990's FOX Kids "Spider-Man" animated series. And it was latter "Essential" volumes of the "Spider-Man" titles that I started learning the comic origins of Felicia Hardy. Felicia is different from practically ALL of the women that will be listed in this entry, because while she LOATHED the concept of Peter Parker, she wanted a relationship with SPIDER-MAN! That's right, she was the only woman in Peter's life that wanted to be exclusively involved with his heroic identity! She's also a solid Spider-Friend, through their many relationship ups-and-downs, with her luck altering powers that she received through Wilson Fisk's scientific plotting. After she was THRASHED in a three-way battle between Spider-Man, Doctor Octopus, and The Owl, Peter decided that he couldn't deal with her placing herself in the middle of every one of his conflicts, and risking her life. Plus, the fact that he picked up on the "Kingpin" connection, and how Peter was growing weary of a relationship where he really couldn't be himself, and it was a ticket to Splitsville! But to this very date, Black Cat has been a part of Peter Parker's many twists and turns in life, even if I do believe she is still in an adversarial position from the time that Peter's body was taken over by Doctor Octopus, and the way that Peter layethed the smackdown on Black Cat during that time span. Remember, fellas, hell hath no fury, and all that...
4. Deb Whitman
Deb, Deb, Deb... I became aware of her... either through Essential volumes of "Web of Spider-Man" or "Spectacular Spider-Man". But she was around during the period where the woman we MOST associate with Peter Parker was out of the picture, Gwen was long departed, and Felicia was busy being her flighty self. But if we all thought the Black Cat was the unlucky lady that crossed Peter's path... we had not yet met a fellow student advisor at Empire State University named Deb Whitman. I liken her to the one MAJOR "doormat" of Peter's life. You see, whenever Peter had to split for Spider-Business, she would go on these mental trips of self-doubt of her importance to Peter's life, and his willingness to establish a relationship to her. Of course, she never TALKED about any of this with Peter Parker. Because that would make perfect sense as adults in a COMIC BOOK WORLD. Nope, she just kept internalizing these doubts. But until a latter ret-con for a character we're STILL GETTING TO... be patient... Deb was the character that was the most close to piecing together the Peter Parker and Spider-Man connection. But with great knowledge comes... great mental breakdowns, and separations from the stress she feels that Peter Parker causes in her life? As if that weren't enough, during the time period where Peter Parker revealed his identity to the world in the wake of "Civil War", Deb Whitman must've decided to emerge from her neurotic shell as a vengeful Valkyrie of the pen, publishing a novel about her time in a relationship with Peter Parker as a personal attack against this revelation. Gee... Taking things a bit too hard, aren't we, Debby? But then again, maybe it was for the best that Peter Parker didn't have to deal with Deb Whitman reaching that sort of boiling point in an active relationship status!
5. Carlie Cooper
"Brand New Day". Brand new girl. Semi-same issues Peter had with Deb Whitman, only with a woman that was less neurotic, and more hinging along being aggressively psychotic. But at least after the "Spider-Island" event, Carlie became more of a tolerable character... after she split with Peter Parker. But she was yet ANOTHER lady in the chain of "like Peter Parker, had NO use for Spider-Man" relations. One factor she did have over the other ladies was that, due to her law enforcement position, Carlie was more than capable of taking care of herself. (She does earn added points for attempting to gain a position in a roller derby team. I'm sorry, but I will ALWAYS have a soft spot for "Derby Dolls". You ladies rock!) Her major relationship failing was that, remember all the issues Deb Whitman internalized? Well, Carlie was not shy in EXTERNALIZING her issues with Peter Parker in many shouting matches. ... Solid relationship foundations, eh? But after she gained Spider-Powers, like the rest of New York, then lost them after the Spider-Queen's machinations failed, Peter was taken to task by Carlie about his involvement with Spider-Man, and she was not satisfied with his explanations, and another relationship bites the dust. She DID, however, continue on as a participant during the "Superior Spider-Man" period, with her deductive reasonings tingling from the changes in Peter's personality. That tends to happen when you're being controlled by one of your most deadly adversaries in Doctor Octopus.
6. Mary Jane Watson/Parker
Joe Quesada be damned: to my reckonings, despite all retroactive continuity developments, for my time of reading the "Spider-Man" titles, Mary Jane Watson will ALWAYS be the definitive Spider-Man woman. And what an interesting path she took to become such a solid part of Peter's life. (Before editorial mandates and Mephisto arrangements altered that... *Wet fart noise*) She began as a mystery woman that Aunt May was constantly trying to set Peter up with. At least she was a TOTAL mystery when Steve Ditko was involved with "Amazing Spider-Man", so much so that we never saw her face! But when "Jazzy" John Romita Sr. stepped up as regular Spider-Artist, we found out that Peter Parker DID hit the jackpot with this red-headed tiger! However, she had a LOT of personal growth to achieve over the years, with her starting off creative life as a go-getter party girl with utterly INSANE "hip" dialogue. It took the death of Gwen Stacy for Mary Jane to begin being transitioned into a romantic interest for Peter Parker. And even THEN she had to walk away to "find herself" after one marriage proposal from Peter. But after things with the Black Cat and Deb Whitman fell through, Mary Jane returned from her global sojourn to become a whole and stable woman, and after much discussions, we entered the 1987 much-publicized wedding of Peter and Mary Jane. Spider-Man tied the KNOT! HOLY COW!!! And for nearly 20 years, with some hiccups in the middle of things, Peter and Mary were THE solid couple of comic-dom! Their relationship survived threats to Mary's life from Peter's Spider-Man existence, a pregnancy and miscarriage, and the supposed death of Mary Jane. (It was more of a disappearance, and a REALLY stupid story at that. John Byrne may generally be a great artist, but no denying that his late 90's and early 2000's writing was... bizarre at best.) "One More Day" ended Peter's sweet existence, but even since the start of the "Brand New Day" era, Mary Jane has never been far from Peter's life.
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